Over the years, one of my greatest concerns has been my sister, Candy. Some of you know that she struggles with depression and know that I went and got her and her cat a few years back. She lived with us in our travel trailer for over a year. Over time, she improved and got back to her old self. Feeling confident that she could make it on her own, we moved her belongings back to Louisiana.
She seemed to flourish at first, but gradually she reverted back to the way she was before I went and got her. She is a lovely woman, but is some what unique in how she lives her life. I have tried to understand her, but nothing has prepared me for how sick she really is. She is a hoarder. Her son and his family have tried to help her with no avail, so have I, but she goes back to that place where I guess she feels comfortable.
She left some of her stuff at my house and after a year, I decided to take it to her home yesterday. My husband and I loaded up my Toyota Tundra truck with all of her stuff. I stopped off at Ruston, La. to pick up our youngest son, Hunter, as he was going to help me unload all of her belongings.
Candy has been in bed for over three months. I know she is in pain. I understand that all too well. Her sleep hygiene is all messed up. I ask her to get up and go to lunch with us. All she could say was that she hurt too much and besides it would take her 1 1/2 hours to wash her hair and get ready. All I could say was "You have to be kidding me.?"
There is nothing I would not do or have not done for Candy. I love her very much. I can't understand how or why she chooses to live this way. It makes me sick to my stomach. I am out of ideas and don't know what else we can do for her. I repeatedly ask her "Are you OK?" She nods yes. This is not how normal people live is it?
Her home was in disarray and the smell was horrible. I could not stand the smell and stayed outside. This is the worst I have seen her home. I think she uses this to alienate herself from others. Her family can't visit her at her home. I know that is not the point, but she doesn't want to visit them. Her grand kids are her life.
She looked like the living dead. Her hair was twisted, dirty and looked like a bird's nest. Her poor cat is the same way. I don't know how to help her. Her DIL called me last night. They had stopped by to see Hunter at the fire station. He must have said something to them. I haven't been able to process all of this. I was going to wait a few days until I called them. They are aware of the situation. They are stumped as well. I don't have any ideas as to what we should do for her. Or even if we should try?
I guess what I am asking for is prayers for Candy. If you have any solutions please let me know. I am at a loss for answers. Should I even try to help her? or leave her alone?